"You got a lifetime". Humbly... what I have learned so far.

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"You got a lifetime. No more. No less".

Neil Gaiman* said this.

For me it carried profoundness in its simplicity, which I intuitively felt but could not quite articulate. It wasn't until the celebration of two birthdays, a first and a forty-first, that Neil's words finally became clear - Our lifetime; this grand adventure, is "finite". It wasn't an epiphany so much as it served as a wonderful reminder. Admittedly, I sometimes assume this adventure will all last forever, and take it for granted. 

As I smiled at myself for taking so long to catch on, I also reflected on what I have learned so far, and how this would serve me as I continued my adventures over the next forty years. I will tell you this comes from personal experiences, and humbly, this is what I have so far: 

 

  • People will shape your life... today, tomorrow, and tomorrow's tomorrow. You may know them intimately or only from afar, but they will teach and inspire; you will talk with them, hear about them or read their history. All of them influencing... good, bad or indifferent. Sometimes you will get it right, and sometimes not so much, but in the end every person will impact you; choose who you associate with carefully and decide if you want them influencing your life. And remember this is a two way street.
  • You can do much in a lifetime, but sadly you cannot do it all. When you look at your life the question to ask yourself on a regular basis is, "Am I satisfied?" If the honest answer is "no", you must ask yourself why and fix it. It's not just about asking the question itself, but rather asking it on a regular basis... and I mean daily. Leaving this question for years or even decades will not only make it more difficult to fix, but may profoundly impact those people around you.
  • You will get scared, and that is very human. When you are scared you need to recognize it, understand it, and not let it stop you. It is never as bad as you think it is, and you will get through it. Being scared is never a reason to not do it, particularly when it comes to satisfaction.
  •  Comfort level is deeply personal, and is not relative to anyone else but you... one person's comfort is another's risk. I have discovered some of the most wonderful aspects of life are found outside what you define as your comfort level. If it scares you a little, it's probably a candidate for the to-do list. Celebrate bravery at any level!
  • Do not take it for granted! It may last a lifetime, or gone in the blink of an eye... appreciate it when you have it, and cherish the memory when it is gone. You will be richer for it!

I'm satisfied with my list so far... but again, I still have a lifetime. No more. No less.

gpe

* Neil Gaiman is married to Amanda Palmer, and if you have read any of my earlier blogs, you know I'm in love with her. No disrespect to Neil intended.

In memory of...

It was two years ago today that I said my final farewell to my oldest friend; we laid him to rest on a Monday and I vividly remember the white gloves we were asked to wear as pallbearers - Symbolic I suppose... no longer to be touched by the flesh of the living.

Not surprising, hundreds paid their respects and he was eulogized by the chief of police; we laughed more than we cried, and celebrated his life... how could you not but laugh when told the story of being bitten on the ass by your own police dog. His life was a treasure chest of stories and people; rich by any measure.

Cancer, all too familiar and sadly predictable, took him from his wife, his family and his friends - All that is left are memories and these stories of a lifetime. Stories of friendship, character, compassion and courage; stories that have, in a humble way, shaped my own. 

"You got a lifetime. No more. No less"* - Knowing this, you write the best story you can and live your life. 

And life goes on. 

You find yourself putting these memories on the top shelf, and continue writing your own story...never forgetting, but eventually not quite remembering. Until a moment occurs; once more to be flooded with the memories of friendship, brotherhood and laughter. A reminder of why we are here, and what is important.

July 1st is Canada Day and the skies will be filled with fireworks to celebrate the nation; I will also quietly celebrate the life of Garth Jung, as this is one of those moments that I remember my friend and his story.

In Memory of Garth Jung (1960-2013), and all those who have touched our lives.

gpe

* Neil Gaiman said this