"How are you doing?"

Decades of sitting behind desks, in airplanes or in a car has blessed me with very tight hips which, when not tended to, can be a crippling and painful proposition until the anti-inflammatories kick in. One of my preventative strategies is to walk each and every day which not only helps me deal with the bane of my existence but also gives me an opportunity to enjoy the neighbourhood, and its cast of characters (myself included).

The bows in his legs reminded me of cowboy caricature, like a cartoon character you would find each Saturday morning shooting his way through the wild wild, west; the six-shooter in each hand however had been replaced with canes. It was obvious as I approached each step was a painful venture and as I passed him I nodded and habitually asked, “How are you doing?”

I heard him quietly reply, “I’m not doing as well as you are”.

I will admit this was a number of weeks ago and I’m still trying to unpack and understand the response — was I surprised with his boldness for not offering up the obligatory response to a stranger, was it the realization that my sporadic mobility issues pale in comparison to real challenges, was it a reminder that perspective is everything, or maybe simply that life is sometimes an unfair proposition. In the end, the interaction has reminded me that success and happiness need to be aligned with personal benchmarks.

I can only speculate what his answer would have been if we had met as I hobbled along piloted by an anti-inflammatory haze; probably something different would be my guess. None of this is meant to discount the challenges we all face as we make our way but I think this is a nice example of the importance for measuring to internal milestone because as we all know, at any given time, you can always find someone who is richer, smarter, prettier, faster, healthier or stronger… just check out your social media feeds. “How are you doing?” (or in a slightly wordier form“How is the progress to your goals going?”) can only be measured against the milestones you set for yourself, and these become the reference points when you are looking for the answer. Remember the operative word in this question is “you” and it is “your” progress.

Looking for outside references simply surrenders ownership, and as you probably know, there can only be one owner. It’s best that it’s you.

iamgpe

PS: I hope everyone is doing well and everything is going according to plan!

When you pick up that hammer...

I should make it very clear up front that a hammer is a very important part of any tool box but it can’t be the only tool — and with that said, I shall continue.

“If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.”

This phrase is affectionately called Maslow’s hammer and is attributed to 20th Century psychologist Abraham Maslow. It finds its way into conversations when action comes about through single mindedness, a lack of capability or a lack of imagination, and usually precedes results that are “less than optimal”.

Recent developments in Toronto have me thinking of good ol’ Maslow, and although will have me skirting around politics, cancel culture and the sins of our past, I wanted to highlight a hammer in action — illustrating how lots of noise will be made but in the end, there is little if any real progress to solving the problem.

Like almost everyone who lives in Toronto (and the surrounding suburbs) I did not know who Dundas Street was named after until recently. It turns out that this 25 kilometer stretch of road through the middle of Toronto (that has been around forever and a day) was named after a Scottish politician named Henry Dundas from the late 1700’s; who although an abolitionist, voted for a four year delay to abolish slavery in Britain — Henry Dundas never came to Canada and as I understand it, had nothing to do with the formation of Canada. Recently a petition was put forth to change the name of the street due to this link with slavery and city council just voted to change the name (I also understand there are a number of other streets being reviewed; some named after actual slave owners). They say the cost will be somewhere in the order of $6 M (which is most likely understated and does not include all the rippling costs that comes with a change of this magnitude). A naming committee will start in 2022 and work would probably start in 2023/2024 with disruption to follow and throughout all of this, the odd press release to explain what is happening (or maybe not).

I can’t help asking myself if this is really the only solution? So for fun, I went into my toolbox and pulled out a knife.

Why not identify a Canadian with the last name Dundas who represents what Canada stands for, and with big fanfare, re-commemorate Dundas Street on their behalf — plaques could be put at each major intersection in honour of the person and her accomplishments, as well as the values of our community. Reframe what Dundas Street stands for, keep it top of mind for anyone who uses it, and give it meaning. As I said, twelve months ago Dundas Street had no meaning to me other than just being a street.

My little exercise with a mental knife was a nice reminder that to be an effective problem solver you have to ask yourself, “Am I using the same old hammer to solve a problem?”

And more importantly, “Is it really working?”

iamgpe

The reflection of a nation...

I was born into a lower middle class family and grew up in what could accurately be called white suburbia just outside of Toronto. At the time my knowledge of our indigenous population consisted of the stereotypes that came from westerns in the movies and on television and that Tecumseh was an Indian Chief who fought along side Sir Issac Brock to help defeat the Americans in the War of 1812 (it was actually more of a conflict we didn’t lose). They also offered great inspiration for professional sports franchises and of course, they lived on reserves far away from the schools I attended. I only bring this up to level set my ignorance.

Recently the psyche of a nation was put on display with the report of a mass grave of 215 indigenous children found on the grounds of a now boarded up Residential School, and soon after, other reports of unmarked graves found on the grounds of other such schools — the whispers of murdered children and cultural genocide were getting louder each day. This Residential School System, unique to Canada’s indigenous population, involved physically removing children from their families for years, stripping the children of their culture and language, and attempting to beat the Christian faith into them (and I say this most literally).

I am the first to say that a person should not pay for the “sins of their father” but since the last Residential School closed in the 1990s it’s impossible not to look in the mirror and question my complicity as a Canadian — even if it’s just for my ignorance. The complexity of the discussion is broad and is a layered compilation that spans over two centuries — European colonialism, religious expansionism, institutional racism, broken and misguided bureaucratic initiatives, cultural genocide, broken agreements, and broken promises. It begs the simple question, ‘“Where do I start”? My daughter asked me the other day what we can do about this and the only answer I could give was we need to shine a very bright light on the situation — we need to understand, we need to listen, and we need to acknowledge our history. We definitely can not let this slip back into the shadows where it’s destined to continue. In all of this, I’ve also come to conclusion Canada is a country that does not protect its children, and for this sin, will never become the country it says it is.

As well as shining that bright light on the situation, my humble suggestion is to better focus on our children; all our children. As a country, we need to ensure they are all safe, healthy and thriving. This will not address the sins of the past but it is a good place to start and will secure a better future.

So this is how I spent my Canada Day — reflecting and simmering with outrage.

It also struck me that Canadians may be (pound for pound) among the most dangerous people in the world… we are smart, have ample resources, and look how ruthlessly we treat our own children. When we say sorry, I wouldn’t assume we actually mean it.

iamgpe